Novel Bin Chapter 143.2
And that Raul had given her a numbing potion.
While deriding himself, Raul asked Harriet sullenly.
“What’s the result of that now?”
“…”
“When the Fabranian knights found out, the plan was changed to killing you. ―― If it is carried out, Fabrania and other countries will denounce Garkhain for letting you die.”
Of course, some countries would try to assess the situation properly.
But this event would definitely be a stain on Garkhain.
There was no way the Crown Prince and his fiancee could hold a wedding after another country’s royalty had been killed in the country.
Their marriage would be postponed, and all the countries would exchange rumors about the country’s failure to protect its guests.
Even as he imagined that future, Raul vaguely recalled.
“Always lie.”
He had been told that over and over again when he was a child.
“Let go of your hopes and wishes while you still can…You can, Raul.”
Said the white-haired old man, the previous chief of the Hunters.
“Your heart is a hindrance. True emotions can slow you down. That’s how you tame a lie and turn it into the perfect shadow.”
“Hmm. I understand, old man.”
Raul nodded honestly, because he understood it well.
After all, he had lived on his own until the old man picked him up.
Raul’s earliest memory was of a night spent staring at the dirty fingertips of his dead mother in the corner of an alley.
From then on, the only thing he learned to do in his desperation to survive was to observe adults.
There was no point in begging for food or coins if he had no chance of getting them.
So Raul sat still and watched the people on the streets.
Did they have enough money in their pockets?
How were they feeling at the moment?
What behavior did they like, and what could they do to help Raul?
He studied them every day, experimenting with different behaviors.
As he did so, he began to understand many things.
What people wanted, what they might want. What kind of flattery made them vulnerable, and what they couldn’t refuse.
Smile even if you are not happy. Shed a tear or two even if you’re not sad.
That was what young Raul kept telling himself.
If I lie like that, I can eat bread tomorrow anyway.
It was probably a way of life that suited him.
One day, Raul met the previous head of the hunters, who saw through his lies and said he would take him in and raise him himself.
In return, he ordered him to learn the skills of a hunter and take over.
“Thank you. I’m glad you like me. I’ll do my best.”
Raul smiled at his predecessor.
But the truth was, he wasn’t happy at all.
From now on, if I lie and smile and follow this grandfather, I can eat every day…How nice…
Raul still remembered the relief he felt at that moment.
If he lied, pretended to be something he wasn’t, and behaved in a manner people found likable, he wouldn’t starve.
That was the only thing that mattered to him, so even after he followed the previous head, he did as he was told and trained himself.
When he was praised, he would pretend to be happy, and when he was scolded, he would pretend to be sorry.
Thanks to his experience in desperately observing adults, the “doubles” he played, where he acted just like the targets of his protection, were getting better and better.
But…
As he grew older, sometimes he would suddenly have questions.
What exactly makes me feel happy?
At a time when he was beginning to lose sight of this, Raul was assigned to guard the princess in a certain country.
It was only for a short period, only about a year.
Raul was about eleven years old at the time, and the Princess, he believed, had just turned sixteen.
“Raul. What makes you happy, Raul?”
Raul was annoyed whenever the Princess who smiled carefree asked him questions like that.
Happiness was not something a shadow hunter needed.
“And what do you like to eat? I’ll tell the cook to prepare whatever you want to eat.”
I don’t even need what I like…If I were aware of something like that, I would have known what I don’t like.
“You know, Raul? I’ll soon be married to another country for political reasons. I’m only going to stay here for a short time with you guys.”
The golden-haired princess smiled sadly as she brushed her hair behind her ear.
“I hope I can see your real smile by then.”
“You are so kind, Princess. Why would you want that of me?”
She patted Raul’s head when he asked with a chuckle.
“That’s the thing. Because I want to be as happy as possible in my marriage.”
“…?”
“Because I want to believe that my political marriage has made children like you in this country happy.”
Her smile seemed to have a slight tinge of sadness to it.
“If I can believe that, I’m sure I’ll be happy in my new home.”
At the time, Raul had no idea why the Princess would say such a thing.
The princess was the first person he had ever observed, but couldn’t fathom.
At first, he was disgusted by it. But eventually, a sense of curiosity sprouted in him.
It was the first time in a long time that he felt his own emotions.
It was such a pure feeling, not because he wanted someone to like him, or because of a need to pretend to be someone else.
So he desperately observed her. In order to stay by her side, he also trained himself harder than before as a hunter so that he wouldn’t be left out among her security.
He hadn’t given a second thought to her wish of seeing his real Raul smile.
Whether I laugh or not has nothing to do with her happiness, right?
But he also understood that such a wish to make his master happy was a big deal.
The one who will make her happy is the man who will become her husband…So I have to protect her with my life until the day she gets married.
And a year later, she married.
He was told that her destination was a great power, and that it was the emperor of that country who wanted to marry the Princess.
Since the emperor wanted her to be his bride, she would be happy.
Even if it was a political marriage, she would surely smile as she wished.
That was what he had believed.
However, Raul soon realized how naive his thoughts were.
“――I heard that she took her own life.”
It was only a year later that Raul heard the news from the chief.
“I had one of the hunters look into it. The other side informed us that she was ill, but that was false.”
“Why did she commit suicide? Is it perhaps because she was distressed over her stillborn child…?”
“No, there are reports that she was terribly thin, scrawny, and weak before she gave birth. She had suffered in her marriage…”
The hunters, including the chief, whispered to each other in hushed tones.
Raul’s keen hearing picked up everything.
“The only reason this country has not been invaded is because of her political marriage and all the misfortunes she has borne.”
“…”
Apparently, the Princess was married off because she was chosen as a hostage.
The tale that she was a desired bride wasn’t at all true.
That was why she was collecting small wishes in hopes that she would stay firm and behave well in her marriage.
“It’s heart-rending…That environment must have been more painful than death for her.”
The chief nodded.
“―― Garkhain, that the country she’s married into.”
T/N: I was tearing up at the story of the Princess, then I was like Whaaaat??????!!!! That means Harriet and Arnold are siblings???? Yup, my mind just went haywire